Part 2 - New Habits Without Willpower
There are 2 different ways of looking at change, the “normal” way, and the Undieting way.
Let’s take a look at Breakfast. Say you’ve been told to eat breakfast but it’s always been a big struggle. This time you’re determined and ready rock this!
*A note for non-breakfast eaters – this example is for someone who feels better when you eat breakfast…but struggles to find the time. Some of you reading this feel nauseated at the idea of eating breakfast – and that’s a-okay. Your body doesn’t want to eat first thing in the morning, and you don’t need to force food down your gullet. Just eat something, even just a piece of fruit, before 11am – noon so your blood sugar stays steady.
The “Normal” Way –
You set your alarm earlier, you’ve got a plan, you’re ready! WOO!
Day 1, you get out of bed in time to cook, you eat breakfast, and feel better because of it
This is working and you enjoy it, so you continue this pattern for a long time…but eventually, life gets in the way.
This might be a busy season, a cold/flu, or some visitors staying at your house. Life will ALWAYS happen, and frequently that can sidetrack whatever change you’re trying to make, even if you’re really happy with it.
This is because you’re needing to use willpower to wake up early and make breakfast. Whenever life gets in the way, any change that involves willpower or is a big lifestyle shift becomes impossible. You’ll fall “off track” and you may feel guilty about it or that you failed.
But this was inevitable. It happens to everyone. It’s not your fault.
The Undieting Way –
Let’s stick with breakfast, and you’re just as committed. But…this time you take YOU into account.
Some things you consider about yourself:
maybe you’re not a morning person and waking up early can be a struggle
maybe mornings are chaotic due to partners, pets, kids, etc
maybe you like breakfast but you don’t want to spend time cooking
This is key - there’s always a way, no matter what your morning is like. By taking YOU into account it becomes a lot easier to make a change.
Instead of trying to make a perfect breakfast in the morning, you consider some ways to work around your morning.
Like:
Can you make something the night before? Or as a big batch and stored in the freezer? This would make it grab and go.
Can you keep ingredients at work to make breakfast? Esp. helpful if your mornings are chaotic.
The most important part is that you create a “usual” option PLUS something for those extra busy days. This is your back up plan because even when it’s easy, life can still get in the way.
You want to take into account what happens if you’re up late, or have no ingredients, or no batch of breakfast. This could be something you can pick up on your way into work, other ingredients on hand (like toast).
Can you see how much different amounts of willpower are needed for option 1 vs option 2? With Option 2, you WILL eat breakfast because it works inside your day.
No willpower change = embracing who you are <3
This makes your new change become a non-negotiable, it becomes a permanent change really, really quickly.
If you’re using willpower, it will run out eventually. It’s like a muscle and it gets tired. If your change hasn’t become a habit before your willpower runs out, then it won’t stick.
Instead, the Undieting way, is to just use a very small amount of willpower for a change that can become a habit quickly.
How do you know if it’s a change that will use very little willpower? Let your confidence guide you. Always be 95% sure that this change will be easy to accomplish. If you feel less than 95%, then just shrink that change.
The more you “power through” and use willpower for a BIG change, when you “fall off the wagon” (which is inevitable, not a weakness on your part), you’ll feel so deprived that it’ll be REALLY hard to get back to your habit.
Small changes = very little deprivation = change becomes easier
This is how I changed my diet from a highly processed diet to the whole food diet that I eat today. It doesn’t take any willpower because I don’t feel like I’m deprived of anything. I eat the food I like and that feels good.
How to Create Undieting Changes -
Step 1 – think about a change you want to make
Step 2 – think about your own patterns, habits, and lifestyle
Step 3 - break that change down into smaller steps.
Step 4 – find a change you’re 95% sure you can totally rock and you’re excited to try
Step 5 – rock it!
Real-life example:
Say you eat out 3 or 4 times per week and you’d like to eat at home more often (6 – 7 times per week), start by looking at what works. What is your day like on the days you cook at home vs. the days you pick up take out or go to a restaurant?
Next, look at your real life. What days feel almost impossible to eat at home? Are there days that are so chockfull that cooking at home seems like a wild fantasy? Are there days that have space to cook something, but only if it’s SUPER quick and easy?
Lastly, look at your food habits. Are there days that you have the time and energy to cook, but there isn’t any food in the house? Do you keep basic staples in the house to be able to throw together a quick meal?
For me, I like to make things that are SUPER quick and easy, that’s how I find the most success. So, I would start by taking one of the days where I cook dinner and make a double batch…creating an almost magically easy dinner for the next night (or 2 nights later if you or your family get bored easily).
Another option – start with one extra day (maybe a day you sometimes cook) and make a plan. What can I cook with the time and energy I have on that day? Be sure you have the groceries in the house and have at ‘er!
Important note: If this is a situation you relate to, but you’re super excited and want to start cooking at home every day right away…please bring some kindness and gentleness to your goal. Cars can’t hit 100mph immediately after hitting the gas…and changing a habit dramatically can be just as hard to keep permanently. Harness your excitement! Use it to make some great changes! But also, be kind and realistic. Your body will be happier that way <3.
Embrace who you are and you’ll find a change/solution that works for you & your household. It’s the kinder and easier approach <3.
Head over to Part 3 to learn how to tune into your body and learn your body’s language <3